Posts tagged “epic fail”

Hertz, Donut*

*Referring to a dumb, fun, and rather apt joke

I tried to opt-out of unwanted marketing email from Hertz. The link in the email took me to this outrageous page.

Go ahead. Try to parse the nested logic and dense legalese. To add insult to injury, I was unable to submit without the ugly red form error admonishment (“You have entered an incorrect option. Please correct and resubmit”) for the whole first set of options. I eventually had to submit it without any of those checked. Will I get more unwanted marketing email? I’ll have to check with my lawyer about that.

Dear Valued Lenovo Purchasing Unit 29 Stroke J

A month ago I ordered a new laptop computer from Lenovo. It was supposed to ship 3 weeks after I ordered it, but by the time the shipping date arrived, the online status no longer showed a shipping date. I called for info about my order and was promised they would check into it and call me back. They did not. I emailed asking about my order, but never heard back.

Today I get this email (bad characters and typos included)

Dear Valued Lenovo Customer,

Thank you for your recent Lenovo order. We are working to ship your order as soon as possible. However, due to an industry constraint on the Intel Core™ i7 processoor, the shipment of your purchase will be delayed. At this time we cannot provide you with a specific shipping date.

We wanted to inform you of this delay as soon as possible, and offer you a couple of choices regarding your order:
1) We can transition your order from the Intel Core™ i7 processor to the Intel Core™ i5 processor. This will result in a $150 decrease from the purchase price of your original order, and we can ship the product within two weeks of rebooking the order.
2) Leave your order as is, and when the Intel Core™ i7 processor becomees available, we will build your system with high priority and ship to you as soon as possible.

Below are the technical differences between the two processors to help you make your decision. They share many of the same features and functions, but the i7 does provide a larger cache that can make a difference if you are running data-intensive applications and games.

followed by this lovely chart:

Ummm, pardon? Sure, if you buy a computer you are sadly forced to deal with terms like “clock speed” and the like, but as a consumer am I really being asked by Lenovo to deal with “Lithography” as a relevant influencing factor on my decision?

In addition to this just being a wholly unsatisfactory customer experience (30 days later and I’ve got no computer and at best I am offered a lesser computer in another two weeks?) I can’t believe that a company I am doing business with chooses to communicate with me in this arcane and frankly disrespectful manner. Lenovo, how’s about meeting me where I live?

Series

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