I already described the ridiculous persona-encrusted collateral from Yahoo’s Search Marketing. This week I received a package from Microsoft (with an unnecessary piece of styrofoam in the box to protect their precious wire-bound book).

With tips from me – Search Master Steve

Search Master Steve? Good Lord!

I’m not sure whether Microsoft’s only-works-in-IE search marketing interface is worse than Yahoo’s. I guess it’s like asking if you’d rather have two fingers ripped off by an angry gorilla or have three fingers removed surgically. These products are not fun to use and the crap I’m getting in the mail from the Microhooligans is insulting.

My latest Core77 Broadcast is up; I speak with Will Tschumy and Chris Bernard who recently joined Microsoft as User-Experience Evangelists. Steve says check it out.

If you’re sending someone a resume, make sure you turn off track changes in Word.

Seeing that Award winning right brained/left brained marketer was changed to Award winning right brained/left brained marketer and business developer is perhaps more information than this person wanted me to know. There’s all sorts of evil hidden goo left behind in Word documents; to be extra sure, MSFT offers a plugin that creates a clean copy, or just make a PDF. Maybe this person doesn’t even use track changes and didn’t see the same view of the doc that I do. Pretty horrifying for them, as well. Makes me wonder what I’ve done like this myself.

More trouble for the poor guy in his cover letter, that was pasted into email from a text editor where many of the characters didn’t come through correctly on my end.

I?¢‚Ǩ™m a global leader of strategy with strong expertise in how to
tackle new markets and clients. Some highlights included:
?Ǭ? Developed strategy, leadership, innovation for Fortune 500
companies that resulted adding hundreds of millions of dollars in new
sales revenue, plus decreased operational expenses by 27%.

A cautionary tale for all of us!

In My Microsoft Google Yahoo Stories we get some comparisons of internship experiences at 3 big tech companies. I don’t recommend the article necessarily, only to provide context for this awesome chart.

I love how the deconstruction of the experiences (related in detailed narratives in the article) into these specific categories give a blunt and amusing summary of, well, the person relating it. What categories we create to represent something qualitative tells a lot about us and how we make sense of those experiences.

I had a fun time at a Microsoft event in SF yesterday, essentially a product demo day, with 300 people watching presenters tweak HTML (and other arcane variants of such code), and then some more intimate discussions on design, user experience and so on by Chris Bernard. Given the emphasis on User Experience, I thought these demo kiosks were lovely but discouraging to use.

Things look nice.

I’m not sure about the term demo assets exactly, and why I need to get them ready, but the mess of a screen at least has a “do this first” zone.

Except it’s a non-stable trick. They put a Windows shortcut on top of that white triangle, but I accidentally dragged it when I went to click it. It’s not really a button, it’s a fake button, and one that easily breaks when someone tries to use it. Oops.

Okay, so now you do the double clicking they want you to do. And up comes a DOS window that lasts more than 1 second. Maybe I’m just un-tech enough to have that bother me, but it really seemed like the backstage was being revealed in a way that it shouldn’t. Why do I see DOS stuff when I’m running a new Windows app?

Anyway, it wasn’t clear what that was doing (perhaps restoring things to a pristine state) and it was even less clear what to do next. Some things to click were just Word documents that you couldn’t interact with (that’s a demo?), and others were apps that gave dire warnings about expiring betas. Again, maybe I’m not the right person to be trying this stuff anyway, but you can see that the commitment to design and user experience has a long way to go.

My hosts were exceedingly kind with their time and made me feel very welcome, so I apologize for having the poor grace to only post something negative. I suspect they are only too aware of the many instances of this sort of thing going on, and are marching uphill. But at least they are marching!

Most of the EPIC 2005 Program has been posted.

What do you think?